This week’s Adventures in Adequacy comes from Beth in Florida. Beth solved the problem of how to have a toddler birthday party with a minimum of drama and expense and maximum fun for attendees. She did this without a caterer, an event planner, or a $500-an-hour clown.
The Completely Adequate
Toddler Birthday
Friday was Alex’s 2nd birthday, and at the last minute, I decided to have a small shindig…..but 2 year olds are nuts, so nothing terribly orchestrated would work for terrorists. Here was my path:
- Sent out a text message for a play date at the park with about 8 moms—did not reveal it was for his birthday.
- People would buy crap we don’t need and I would have to find a place in the shoe box we call a house to put un-needed crappola.
- People wouldn’t come because they didn’t want to deal with figuring out a gift (aka-losers)
- No gifts = I don’t have to send thank you notes.
- Bought vanilla cupcakes with sprinkles and chocolate brownie bites for treats from Publix. Fed my kids the white stuff….let other people deal with chocolate drool on their own kid. No drinks provided—most bring their own sippy cup with whatever for their kids.
Made a stop to Party City to construct goodie bags for the kids. (hats, midget sunglasses, Mardi Gras beads, those little doo bangies that you blow on and they roll out and sometime whistle, chocolate candies and gummy fruits!!)- Brought beach balls for the kids to attack and chase at the park—were a huge hit.
Play at park, throw garbage in can, go home, done. I was able to socialize, take pics, and not be worried about whacking piñatas or whatever.
Adequate Waffle recipe:
Step 1: Place Eggo frozen waffle into toaster*
Step 2: Burn waffle amply on each side
Step 3: Frantically scrape off charred parts into trash before the very finicky child comes down stairs
Step 4: Launch the waffle into the trash can
Step 5: Violate only one of the following two rules – (1) 5-Second Rule; (2) Above the Rim Rule
Step 6: Cut up into the required small portions
Serve with store brand syrup.
* Note: If waffles are whole grain, be sure to violate both rules in Step 5 to avoid over-Adequacy.
No *real* birthday party until 4. (Once at 3, we coincidentally had relatives over and ate cake in the park and called people last minute. A surprising number of people showed up. But no presents.)
4 yo birthday party went very badly.
Now we don’t have birthday parties. She is adamant she doesn’t want one. She is 6. This year, her little friend spent the night one night and she insisted that having him stay over was her birthday party. No cake, no nothing. We didn’t know it was a birthday party (in her mind) or we would at least have had cake.
I kept saying ‘don’t you want a birthday party?’ And she would say ‘Ethan sleeping over WAS my birthday party.’
I guess if we want to be competitive about adequacy I win! My kid is almost 7 and has had a total of 1 actual birthday party.
The weird thing was that I hated birthday parties when I was a kid, especially my own and am reluctant to celebrate my birthday to this day. We have strange similarities of that kind but I am pretty sure there is no gene for ‘hate your own birthday.’
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I have a bunch of coworkers that all had babies around the same time my daughter was born, and as their first birthdays approached, everyone was talking about the theme of the party, how many people they were inviting, etc. I was not about to spend time and money on a party that the guest of honor wouldn’t remember or probably even enjoy (this was during her “I-will-scream-incessantly-at-any-adult-who-isn’t-my-parent-or-my-favorite-daycare-teacher phase”). So instead of having a party with coordinating plates and innumerable friends and relatives, I spent $3 on a giant cupcake and my husband and I had a blast watching her spend 10 minutes trying to pick it up without getting dirty before she just gave up and grabbed it by the icing.
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